Category Archives: fractals for the masses

So It Pauses

Update:Because I could misconstrue this post, I know others can and will as well. Please keep it in the context of the first sentence as much as possible.

One of the precepts of AA is to make amends wherever possible so long as it does not harm or injure again those whom you have already harmed or injured. I’m not allowed to pull off other peoples scabs to stop my bleeding. So it must pause while I figure out a way to say what I need to say in such a way as to keep within those confines.

It is written not to peer too deeply into the things of Satan, which is for many of us merely to look back on our own lives. It is the kernel of recovery that only those of us who have been there can understand, or so we are told.

It is this redemption from God that makes the statement, those whom have been given much, much is expected, especially valid, it doesn’t mean it in a worldly sense. Those who expose themselves to God find that God exposes them to themselves.

I do not find it odd that many of you know me better than my own family, and would only caution that you do not know me as well as I do. I do not have to separate the wheat from the chaff, as some of you know, and as all of you must. Weaknesses are easily spotted by those looking for them, whether in individuals, or collectively. Exploiting weaknesses has a great deal of moral equivalency to it, but it is what it is, morality is merely the rationale of actions justified or condemned.

I have no room for justifications of my own life and times and have moved beyond the condemnations because it is necessary for my own personal recovery. Those of you with eyes to see will see, and those of you with ears to hear will hear, and perhaps understand, everything I’ve been doing the last six or seven years. The reality inside the room has been written rather large, if imperfectly, hasn’t it?